I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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