I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
