Dual....:-)
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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