My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
