Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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