You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
