I CAN MOONWALK!
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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