Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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