The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
