I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
