Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
