Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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