im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
