my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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