guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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