Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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