ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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