This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
high people should be assigned attendants
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
