Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
