i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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