i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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