She went from zero to smokin in five shots
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
