HIV tests are more positive than that guy
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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