That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I just googled if crying burns calories
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize