Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
