Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
