Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
