I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
