i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
