she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
