My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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