My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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