it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
