my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
