Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
sex in a hospital.. check
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize