I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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