I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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