Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
