You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
