i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
