he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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