ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
