Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Randomize
