yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
