capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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