I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
