I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
