in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
