Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
