he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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