Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
