Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Randomize