CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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